Friendship begins with selfishness.

I quickly took my phone out of my bag, set the brightness of the screen to a minimum, and then bowed my head to reply to the message.

"have you finished your message?" The boyfriend's sentence was not only a question, but also a playful joke, "is it Amin again?"

complains that the photos taken by his ex on moments are ugly; which girl is liked by his Weibo account; and even goes to chat with her college classmates after breaking up.

in fact, I have lost count of how many times I have forgotten what I am doing in order to take care of Amin's emotions.

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the ginger and onion chicken in the canteen tastes terrible; my roommate can stay in the toilet for an hour; and the manicure I made while eating Haidilao is unglued in three days.

"but if she really treats you as a friend, she won't let you drink with her when you're in pain." My boyfriend said something unexpectedly, which brought me back to reality.

just the week before last, when I came to my aunt and was rolling by the bed wrapped in a quilt, Amin called to ask me to go out and drink with her and complain about my ex.

"No." It was the first time I hung up on Amin so directly.

I let Amin form the same dependence as a giant baby-tell Taiyi if you are sad, she will catch me anyway.

in fact, I have also tried to complain to Amin about the little irritability in my life.

Amin will focus on talking about "her pain", or simply reject me.

until the end of Qixi Festival, she didn't call me either. Later, when I looked at her moments, she was "busy with sweetness" with her boyfriend, so she didn't have time to talk to me.

the uncomfortable point is: I think our relationship is more like a "doctor" than a "friend".

looking at the poster in the corridor of the cinema, a clip flashed through my mind, which was a conversation between the protagonist and the abbot of the temple.

"anyone who wants something in return is not sincere."

while I was doing emotional work to comfort her again and again, I kept expecting her to fill my emotional gap, but I didn't get it.

not only is it annoying for her to "come to me if you have something to worry about", but I also know that if I have something to worry about and want to talk to her, the other person can't bring me the "emotional satisfaction" I want.

if we regard "becoming friends" as an exchange of interests, then we are exchanging "emotional satisfaction".

this sentence means that I can provide you with products about "emotional empathy and satisfaction", but you have to provide me with similar products when I need them.